Grace Community Christian Church

 

Archived Things Above

Ambushed By God (4/30/02)

Well, it happened again. Yesterday. Completely caught off guard, & for no apparent reason. Tears. Hot, stinging, cleansing. Happy-sad tears of contrition & longing & worship. Unexplainable, yet fully explainable in the light of God's grace.

Twenty-three years ago, on April 6, 1979, I had given my life to Christ. Buried with him in the waters of baptism at the Bux Mont Christian Church in Warminster, Pennsylvania, I had celebrated the event with a hamburger right down the street from where I now sat in my car. And although the store I was parked in front of used to be somewhere else, it was still the Provident Bookstore. A Christian bookstore, run by Mennonites, where I had purchased my first two Bibles.

I find it hard to believe that over two decades have passed since those eager, innocent, anticipation-filled days of my Christian youth. Where had the time gone? Where had the dreams of what I would accomplish for Christ gone? Where had the zeal & enthusiasm & the fire of wanting & knowing God gone?

I'd heard the words before, but maybe it was the timing & the location that opened up the floodgates behind my eyes. Michael W. Smith's Worship CD blared out the song, Draw Me Close. Maybe you know the tune; I hope we start singing it here.

Draw me close to you, Never let me go
I lay it all down again, To hear You say that I'm Your friend
You are my desire, No one else will do
Cause nothing else could take Your place
To feel the warmth of Your embrace
Help me find the way, Bring me back to You

You're all I want, You're all I've ever needed
You're all I want, Help me know You are near.

It's a long song, sung over & over & over. And with each repeated refrain, my heart melted. And it needed melting. I'm forty-three years old; my life is likely more than half over. My kids are just about raised & have begun leaving the nest. I'm in the "grandpa zone." I needed to rediscover the simple truth that all I really need, & want, in life is my relationship with the God who loves me.

I'm not very lovable, by times. And there are times when I cave in to the lie that something or someone beside God will satisfy me. There are times when I feel that He is distant, but in reality, I am the one who has moved. I needed to pray the prayer of that song.

I was ambushed by God yesterday. My little car became a holy temple. Once again I was a priest, offering my heart to the One who offered me His life. A casualty of His grace; a victim of His love.

And glad for it. He is all I need! And He is all you need, too.


Jim Dewar --