FYI
MY CONFESSIONKim Dewar reflects on her recent trip to Haiti “Dieu est si bon”
All of the missionaries got up at 3:30 am and gathered with our flashlights and Bibles by the fence for a walk through the dark streets of Grand Goave to the location of the service for the day. We were told, “Do not approach or touch the dogs, the skinny, lazy dogs that you see sleeping during the day will attack you they are protecting their property!” Once we walked through the gate of the walled Lifeline compound onto the dark street we are met by Matilde (who no one, including herself, knows how old she is) with a bull horn. She is walking up and down the streets announcing in Creole where the Prayer meeting is. There are roosters crowing, donkeys braying, pigs snorting, and many other strange noises. There is the ever present smell in the air from the coal cooking fires. There is the smell of drying mud puddles (it’s the rainy season). There is the overwhelming smell of urine, both human and animal. It is about 80 degrees already but there is a slight breeze. The sensory overload at 3:45 am is something to get your head around, and as we walked through the streets we eventually heard the soft hum of the Haitian people praying. It almost sounded like a buzzing bee hive. It came from the porch of a home, where there were rough wooden benches put out for the “missionaries” We quietly sat down and the singing began. “Dieu est si bon” (God is so Good), then the time of “Merci Savior” prayer, where all the Haitians are praying at the same time. Then the time of scripture recitation by the Haitian believers from memory. Then onto holding up the Bibles in the darkness and counting to see how many believers brought “The Word”. Then the kicker for me, the hymn “Come Thou Font of Every Blessing” I didn’t know the words in Haitian but I knew the tune and the words in English, and finally the tears flowed, not out of pity for the lack of “material things,” and not pity for the very difficult life they have, but for me. For my own heart that doesn’t always see my blessings as blessings because I have so much. I really felt and saw God in the hearts through the words and faces of my Haitian brothers and sisters. You see, I started the whole 4:00 am with a little bitterness in my heart. “4 am? Are you kidding me? Isn’t it enough that we are here sweating, serving and giving up comfort to help them? Enough that we sit next to them through long church services in a language we don’t understand? Enough that we let their babies with no diapers pee all over us? Enough we feed them, give them clothes, try to help them when we don’t understand them, and now we have to get up and pray with them at 4 am? Don’t we get to pass on that one?” Then I remembered why they started the prayer meetings. You see, this area was a heavy Voodoo area, and the Voodoo priests began every day at 4 am beating the drums and chanting to the Spirits for the day. Many of these believers came out of Voodoo, or their parents did, and they became convicted that since they have “The Holy Spirit” or the “True Spirit”, they needed to pray at the same time as the Voodoo priests everyday. Since the Holy Spirit comes through receiving the shed blood of Christ, “Greater is He” and prayers of blessing need to be raised up to Him.
At 4 am in the Haitian dawn I learned that I had forgotten what my real blessing and gratitude should be centered on: The mount of His redeeming love; that I was sought by Jesus to rescue me from danger. That the only real debt worth worrying about is the debt of gratitude for God’s Grace. And how easy it is for me to wander and leave the Lord I love. Never again will I go to Haiti to “help the Haitians,” but I will go to Praise and be Grateful with them.
“Dieu est si bon” |
Really? I admit that after multiple trips both pre- and postearthquake, I still struggle with this when I am in
Haiti. It’s a North American thing, not a Haitian
thing, The Haitian people are constantly proclaiming
“Dieu est si bon”. I didn’t really expect much to have
been improved or changed since January of 2011 on
my ride through Haiti, and I was not disappointed.
There were a few more dumpsters, some had been
emptied, a few pieces of heavy equipment and some
dump trucks filling in the holes, but only on the main
roads around the airport where the media might be.
Beyond that there were still tent cities, portable
bathrooms, Haitians bathing in the street run-off, and
hungry people. But yet: “Dieu est si bon” was the
song on the lips of the beautiful Haitian brothers and
sisters at the Church in Grand Goave and in Jeanty
and at the 4 am daily Prayer service. That’s right: 4am! Talk about a humbling experience. But it’s the 4am service that struck me.